Indescribable

A little over a year ago I posted a thought called "In Between" at which time I stated our great need for God to provide for us in many ways if we were to become the church God is calling us to become. So, I thought I'd give an update.
We still have so very far to go and the opportunity before us is incredible! However, the last 14 months have been amazing. We have seen God provide competent passionate people, abundant resources, and favor in this community beyond what we could have hoped for in this timeframe. It is so exciting!
So, even though we still have a ton of needs ahead of us, I want to at least pause and celebrate what God has done thus far. I realize that I am having the opportunity to participate in something special and I am truly honored to be part of it.
If you ever find yourself in the best college town in America on a Sunday morning, come by and take part in the fun!

Beautifully Chosen

I am bit unique in that I've really not had much experience with girls in my life. My parents were divorced when I was about 5, I have no sisters, no girl cousins, and I have only two boys as children. Bonnie is really the primary girl that God has put in my life and I am blown away by how much better a man I am as a result of her presence.
So, I am well aware that my life would be so much more rich and full if I had a daughter. I have wanted this for some time now and we just haven't gotten pregnant again. Well all along the way, I have had these crazy thoughts about adoption. I feel like it would be such an amazing adventure to welcome a child who has no home into ours and make her our own. To treat her like the princess she was made to be and to help her experience the love-rich home environment that her heart longs for. So, we have decided to do just that. We are pursuing international adoption from China and we are so very excited.
We're just getting started in the process and it's a very long and expensive one, but I am fully convinced that the reward at the end of this journey will be more than worth it.
What would it be like to be left all alone? What if you had no mother or father who knew you intimately? What if no one made you feel like a special unique individual, but rather you were just part of a crowd of the unwanted? How would you manage those feelings?
Then, what if someone went through months and months of hard work and preparation and thousands of dollars of expense to seek you out? What if they prayed and prayed for you and then traveled thousands of miles, leaving everything else behind, just to welcome you? What if they worked ahead of time to prepare a place for you so you would feel warm and special? How would you manage those feelings?
This is the journey our family is starting. We welcome you to share it with us!

Fear or Courage

If God chooses to allow this, I’m aware that one day my two precious little boys
will grow up and leave my home as men. They will walk out our door for the last time and enter their new world. In a really good book I’m reading “Raising a Modern Day Knight” Robert Lewis asks the appropriate question “what will they leave with?” I’m assuming they will drive off in a car and most likely have some possessions in that car, but what will be in them? Will they know what it means to be a man and will they be adequately equipped to live it out?

He defines a man as someone who rejects passivity, accepts responsibility, leads courageously, and lives for the greater reward. There is so much good stuff in this definition, but the one I am focusing on is “leads courageously.” I’m aware that courage isn’t possible apart from fear. Courage is the choice to do the right thing when we’re afraid. The dictionary says it this way “The state or quality of mind or spirit that enables one to face danger, fear, or vicissitudes with self-possession, confidence, and resolution.” Much of my life I’ve been tempted to believe that being courageous is living without fear, but that’s a huge misunderstanding.

This is so important to me because I’m coming to realize more and more clearly the kind of battles I face on a daily basis as a man. One of my huge battles is the barrage of fears and lies I face that essentially say “God will not come through for you here” or “this situation will be really hard and uncomfortable and you won’t be able to stand up under it.” I face these lies in so many ways on so many days. Once I begin to listen to these lies I am then tempted to fall for the next lie which says “You’re only chance to keep this from happening is to get in control and manipulate things. Since God isn’t going to come through for you here you’d better get things under control.”

Oh how these lies have impacted my life! Far too much for my life has been lived in the state of stress that a person feels when they are trying to control something they can’t. It’s the same stress a person feels who is betting on a sporting event. They are doing their best to “will” their team to victory, but it’s of no use. No amount of internal pressure will cause their team to do anything. Jesus said it this way “who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life’s span?” The answer is “no one!”

So, not only have I lived too much of my life believing the lie that “God won’t come through for me.” But while I believe it I often make terrible decisions. I am so sad to say that countless times I have made dumb decisions under the delusion that I needed to be in control. As a matter of fact, I would go as far as to say that I don’t think I’ve ever made a godly wise decision while I was believing that “I need to be in control.”

I am so very thankful for the truth Jesus stated “the truth will set you free.” I need the truth to reign in my mind. I know the lies will continue to battle against me as long as I’m on this earth. I know I will even be afraid at times. I’m just praying that I can model at least one element of manhood (leading courageously) for my incredible little boys. I pray they will be able to say, “I grew up with a dad who courageously chose to believe the truth in the midst of a battle of lies.”

Not as strong as I thought

One of the things I’ve prided (key word) myself on over the last 10 years has been my consistent ability to turn off my work and go home to my family. I’m thankful to say that I am the kind of guy who made it through graduate school without killing my marriage. We actually loved our time in seminary – we played on sports teams, watched ER, and even went to movies (when we could afford it). Then when I got into the working world I kept to my guns. I loved working at North Point. I had a great role in the equipping department. It was a blast to see so much life change and get to be part of such an incredible organization. My boss actually encouraged me to “cheat at work.” So as we started a family I showed up in the driveway like clockwork at 5pm and rarely went back out for evening ministry. I was the model husband (at least in one area :-)

So, as we took on this new church-planting endeavor obviously I planned to keep up my “winning ways” in this area of life. I’m sure I even bragged about it at some time. Let’s circle back around to that “p” word in the first sentence. The book of Proverbs (18.12) says, “Before his downfall a man’s heart is proud.” I don’t really like the word downfall as it relates to my life, but in this area it’s accurate. As I reflect on an incredible year of ministry I have so very much to celebrate, but one of the things I lament is my shortcoming in this key area of my life.

(Here come the excuses) For the first time I’ve had wifi in my house and I have a cell phone with email capabilities. Needless to say each of them have had a significant workout in this past year. Most importantly I dug a bit of hole with my family this year. I non-verbally communicated to them that they were 2nd place in my life. This breaks my heart to recognize. This is a message I never want my family to hear.

It all came to a demoralizing climax recently when my dad had my two boys for the day. My 5-year-old son said “papa, I want a Batman computer for Christmas.” Dad said, “why.” My son replied, “So I can work on my computer like Daddy. He works on his computer all the time and I want to be able to work with him.” My dad shared this with me and it hit me like a ton of bricks.

I already knew I was a bit out of bounds in this area, but this comment from my ever so moldable son confirmed my fear. I have been cheating my family for the sake of my “ministry” this year. It would be very easy to spiritualize this situation and say I was doing it for the sake of the gospel, but I really don’t think that’s the case. I think I’ve checked emails, returned calls, and worked on things from home so I can build a successful church that will make me look impressive to those around me. There is no doubt that I love God and the people of Athens. I desperately want to help them come into a real relationship with Jesus Christ. However, at the same time I battle the temptation to build an impressive church for the sake of my ego. I’m like every other man who attempts to build a kingdom to prove he’s valuable and “has what it takes.” I think this is what has driven me to cheat my family in 2005 and this makes me really sad. Essentially I’m recognizing that I sacrificed my family this year to some degree on the altar of my sense of self-worth. I hate saying it like this because it sounds so bad, but it is completely true.

I know starting a business is hard for anyone and I know that the move to senior leadership is a demanding transition in any professional arena. I also know that I didn’t totally abandon my family. But I know I didn’t communicate the message I want to send. So, this year I will pray that God will lead me victoriously in this area of my life. I pray my family will hear loudly and clearly that they are my number one priority.

I want more!

God has been speaking to me lately about money (mammon/treasure). If you’re anything like me, this is your cue to stop reading this post and move on to the next one. I would do this b/c I feel like I know what’s coming next “stop acquiring nice stuff or get rid of the stuff you have and give it all to the poor.” I don’t want to hear this message b/c I’ve still got a really long list of stuff I want that I don’t have yet. Can you relate? Well, it’s up to you if you want to keep reading.
I’ve had the opportunity to hear several messages on stewardship and I’ve begun studying Matt 6.19 – 21 as well as Luke 12. They’re both fantastic passages with AMAZING application to my life in Athens, GA right now.
Luke 12 is Jesus giving us two big warnings. He says “be on your guard against hypocrisy and greed.” The way I received these was:
1. Sean – you need to be fully aware that everything you say and do privately will one day be made known publicly. So, be very sure that you’re pursuing consistency in both realms. I’m so sad to say that it was the religious leaders of Jesus’ day who were the hypocrites. God, please help me not be that leader in my generation.
2. The second warning is against greed. It’s really interesting that Jesus says we should “be on our guard against” these things. It’s as if they’ll attack us and we need to be ready for the attack. I don’t normally picture greed and hypocrisy attacking me. Anyway, moving on. Jesus says “a man’s life does not consist in the abundance of His possessions. Then He tells a fantastic story of a guy who was blessed with a great crop and he saw the blessing as his chance to be a fat cat. The guy fell for the lie that the field and the crop it produced was his instead of Gods. So, it only makes sense that he would think it was all for him. Jesus said this was tragic b/c he was going to die that night and he would have missed an incredible opportunity to store up eternal treasure with the blessings God had loaned him. The call was to be “rich toward God” instead of storing up things for ourselves.

Here is where this impacts my life. I recently recognized that my current salary is more than 3x that of my very first real job. For this I’m very thankful. At the same time, at each bump in salary, my family has increased our standard of living. Now, I’m not saying this is a bad thing. Especially when our first home was a beautiful used 14x60 singlewide mobile home. It was a thing of beauty! However, I do sense God asking me “how much is enough?” I hear Him saying, “Sean, how much home do you need? In what kind of neighborhood? What kind of furnishings? What about your car? Vacations? Clothing? Eating out? Entertainment?” I really feel like I need to answer these questions. But even more importantly, I feel like I need someone in my life to whom I give these answers and also give them permission and opportunity to speak into my life when or if I begin to make financial decisions that contradict these standards. I’ll just be fully honest here. I can pretty easily become a high-maintenance guy who lives like a fat cat. I often have strong desires for really nice stuff and nice experiences. I’m not saying these desires in and of themselves are bad. Actually I think they’re probably a huge indication of my longing for glory. I long for the place where there is no more death, mourning, crying, or pain. I long for the day when I’m in God’s all satisfying presence and my heart explodes with joy. I think these are my real longings. I just often believe the lie that a new laptop or cell phone or pair of shoes or TV will give me this same satisfaction. When I do this I begin to fall for the lies of greed and ownership.

It’s really cool that Jesus goes on in the rest of this chapter and talks about our temptation to worry, fear, and set our hearts on our needs for food and clothing. 1 Tim 6.8 is a good cross-reference here. He says God is really good at providing these things. We see this in how He cares for birds and flowers. So, the call to you and I is to sell our possessions, give to the poor, seek His Kingdom, and store up treasure in heaven. I’d say we’re incredibly courageous people if we can receive this challenge from our loving Savior and choose to trust Him.

I’d appreciate your prayer that I would recognize that I’m a steward, not an owner and that every investment I make into the things of God really is an investment in heaven where there is no risk and high return. If I believed this it might dramatically change the future of my life. Thanks for journeying with me.

In Between

I’m wanting to capture this moment because I have confidence that I’m on the edge of God’s provision. I’m in the often stressful gap between two fantastic realms – God’s past provision and His future provision. Now the truth is I’m also still reaping the enjoyable consequences of much of His past gifts. So, here is my situation. I’m the pastor of an incredible new church and yet we have so many current needs. We need:
o Finances – by our projections, we need another $650K in the next 11 mos
o Group leaders – we have just launched about 20 community groups and we really need each of these leaders to shepherd the groups effectively
o Talent – we need talented actors, singers, dancers, musicians, teachers, and more
o Servants – we need people to show up at 6am and help us load in our facility each week as well as people to serve as greeters and parking attendants
o Leaders – we need local godly leaders to step up and provide prayer and counsel to eventually become elders
o Passionate attenders – we need people who will continue to embrace the mission and strategy of leading people into a growing relationship with Jesus Christ by creating relevant environments; and people who will invest and invite
The list could obviously go on and the truth is that if we don’t have many or all of these, we simply won’t be the church God is calling us to be in this city. I’m praying that God will provide for us graciously and we will be found faithful with each of His gifts.
So, for now, I’m simply standing in the gap between the past and the future, doing my best to embrace hope and faith in my good and strong Father. I’d love your prayer in this venture as well.

Even When

I have an aquaintance named Rick Pearson (www.rickpearson.org) who seems to be on his way to meet God persionally. Rick is an amazingly talented young musician who appears to be losing a battle with Lukemia. It's a tragic story. At the same time, I've got a very good friend named Josh Jones (www.alreadybeenchewed.com) was also recently diagnosed with Cancer. Josh is a pastor and dad in his late 20's. Josh is not living the easy life by any means, but he is recovering well.

It's been a really thought provoking process to watch these two guys battle major diseases. In the meantime, I appear to be very healthy and life is going great for me. I've got a fantastic wife, 2 beautiful healthy boys, great friends, and a job I love. I said it that way intentionally. I "appear" to be healthy. The truth is, I have no idea what is goig on inside my body or what is waiting around the next corner. I have no promise that I'll wake tomorrow or that any of my family will. There is no gaurentee. So, should I be confident or fearful? Should I live with hope or dread? Should I be anxious or at peace?

God wrote this through Paul in Romans 11.33, "Oh the depth of the riches of both the wisdom and the knowledge of God; how unsearchable are His judgements and His paths beyond tracing out. For who has known the mind of the Lord or who has been His counselor, or who has ever given to God that God should repay Him? For from Him and through Him and to Him are all things. To Him be the glory forever!"

If you go to Rick's site, a song called "Even When" will begin to play. It's a beautiful song that Rick recorded and it's so apropriate at this time. The big idea of the song is even when we don't know what God is up to, we will choose to trust Him and praise Him because He is good.

I certainly pray that God will choose to heal Rick and Josh, in the same way that I pray He will give everyone in New Orleans their homes and jobs back. But, if God doesn't choose to answer in the way I request, I'm also praying that I will still see Him as good and strong; since this is what's true. Please join me in embracing this truth with all our hearts!

Drive 05

I really enjoyed the Drive conference. It was a good time of worship, encouragement, challenge, and affirmation. It’s a huge blessing to be a strategic partner!

Some of the things I’m hoping to takeaway from this are:

Changing
The local church is to be about the great commission which is highly evangelistic
Incremental change rarely gets us to where we want to be – we need the courage to act boldly and make the changes that really need to be made.
Reggie said the only thing that’s sacred is the mission. This made me ask if our strategy and values are sacred.
We need to regularly tell unbelievers “we built this place for you.”
We can’t let the fear of losing people and $ keep us from doing what needs to be done

Relevant Environments
We measure the relevance of an environment by whether or not it’s an appealing context, with engaging presentations and helpful content.
The context of ministry should be shaped by culture! Culture isn’t our enemy, it’s the context in which we live. People are open to learning when they’re comfortable. Does our target audience find this context appealing?

Engaging presentation – how do I create tension so that they are begging me to answer the question? It’s a mistake to deliver content before we’ve made them hungry to hear it.
We have the answers to what is ailing people (sin, sorrow, and death) yet they drive by us on the way to the lake. Why is this?
To blame people is to abdicate leadership. If the learner hasn’t learned, the teacher hasn’t taught. If they aren’t engaged, it’s my fault.
With food we can either eat chicken, meat, or fish. However, there are some places we would much rather eat than others. Why is this? The way it’s prepared and presented makes a huge difference!
Information doesn’t engage people, presentations do.
Note – you don’t have to be the talker to be the leader

Content – this determines interest. CD sales/.mp3 downloads show whether or not our stuff is helpful.
? How many CD’s does NP sell on an avg week?
People are on happiness quests, not truth quests.
Action - I need help in the content area.

We can’t create a program for every need b/c there are as many needs as there are people.

Preaching
The goal of preaching should be to teach people how to live a life that reflects the values, principles, and truths of the Bible.
What do they need to know? Why do they need to know it?
What do they need to do? Why do they need to do it?
How can I help them remember it?

Momentum
New triggers momentum, improved sustains it for the short term, and improving sustains it for the long term.
The business community has learned that you must keep getting better or you get left behind. The church has learned to live with mediocrity.
Momentum will follow the interests of the leader.


Quotes
Don’t take notes on how to do things from people/places that are unsuccessful
We need to be a church of people who haven’t forgotten what it’s like to be lost
Applying a little is better than knowing a lot.
Submission is an invitation to lead.
You rarely gain momentum by doing what you did to create it in the first place.

365 days

This is a pretty exciting time in my life. I'm coming up on my 1 year anniversary with Athens Church. That statement is hard to believe, but it's true.
In light of this fact, God recently helped me to reflect on some of what He has done in these brief days. The list is incredibly long, but it includes an office, volunteers, worshippers, givers, staff, people who believe in us, a web site, a great community group, a really cool neighborhood with neighbors we enjoy, and there is so much more. God used this great reminder to illustrate to me that He is in this venture and it's His church, so He will provide for it's needs. I'm just incredibly honored to be in this city, with this team, and most importantly with my family - partnering with the God of life and love. I'm living a dream!

Vacation 05 with my bride